Orange Diplomacy
by Jojo6
Summary: Oh the horror. It's not even shippy. Short ficlet on Sam and Jack competing over Jonas, but with a twist. Season 6.


Title: Orange Diplomacy 

Summary: Silly 

Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 is an original MGM, Greenburg/Anderson, Gekko, Top Secret, Kawoosh! production. Any material relating to Stargate SG-1 is for entertainment only, and is in no way meant as an infringement on copyrights. In other words, I own nadda. 

Email: randomleaves@yahoo.co.uk Website: www.geocities.com/randomleaves/ 

Thanks to the most wonderful betas in the entire world: Emry, Debbie, Kat and Sandy. 

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Jack leaned forward on the table, watching Jonas intently. Beside him, Carter was trying very hard to look uninterested when he knew the exact opposite was actually true. She was just as interested in the outcome of this experiment as Jack was. 

Teal'c, sitting on Jack's right, was apparently ignoring all of them. Not unusual really. Sometimes Jack got the feeling that Teal'c thought they were children. Okay, okay, so Jack *knew* Teal'c thought they were children, but sometimes it was nice to imagine otherwise. 

Drawing his attention back to the current competition, he watched as Jonas licked the spoon thoughtfully. 

"Well?" Jack prompted impatiently. 

"I'm thinking." He made sucking noises, pursing his lips and running his tongue around his mouth. 

"Jonas..." 

"Colonel, you're going to have to give me some time here." 

"It's not *wine*, Jonas. Either you like it or you don't." 

Carter shifted slightly and Jack made sure she wasn't cheating by giving Jonas any indication of her preferred outcome. He knew Jonas liked her better - she was, after all, actually friendly to the guy. Whereas Jack was just impatient. He hadn't really cared up until this point. 

Now he was beginning to see Carter's logic. 

Pushing the glass dessert cup aside, Jonas reached for his second portion. He poised his spoon over it, flicking his brown eyes up to Jack momentarily. Jack was surprised to see mischief in Jonas' eyes - which could only mean one thing. 

Carter had been giving him lessons in winding him up. 

Dammit. 

Five frustrating minutes later, Jonas pushed aside the second glass cup. He repeated the same process as before, smacking his lips together and sucking every last bit of taste from his mouth. 

"Well?" Jack pestered. 

"Sir, let Jonas decide for himself." 

"Oh, that's right, play the good cop, Carter," Jack said scathingly. It was amazing just how duplicitous she really was. 

Carter rolled her eyes. "This isn't half as important to me as it is to you." 

Oh that was *so* not true. He turned to his Jaffa friend. "Which one did you like better?" 

Teal'c turned the page of his conspiracy theory rag casually and answered without looking up, "As I recall, O'Neill, I refused to participate." 

Jack narrowed his eyes at him. So he had. Actually, if Jack remembered correctly, Teal'c had all but rolled his eyes at the two of them. 

"Finished, Jonas?" 

Swinging his head around, Jack glared at his 2IC as she beamed across the table at their newest teammate. She was smiling *way* too much at Jonas for his liking. The sneaky little.... "Jonas, make a decision," he quickly ordered through his teeth. 

"Okay... I like..." 

Jack and Sam leaned forward further eagerly. 

The brown eyes flickered to each of them, then he smiled. ".... orange." 

"*WHAT?*" 

Jonas shrugged. "Sorry. I tried the orange flavor earlier on and the blue and the red simply don't compare." He stacked the two cups and put them back on his tray, and stood up with it. "See you at the briefing." 

Shoulders slumped, Jack and his 2IC regarded the space that Jonas had just vacated. 

"Damn," Carter muttered, looking like a kid whose hamster had just died. "Not again." 

"Yeah." He nudged her in a friendly fashion with his shoulder. "We oughta get going. I haven't read my reports yet." 

Sam nodded and climbed off of the bench. She came round to touch Teal'c on his shoulder and he lifted his head from the magazine he'd been reading. "Ready?" 

"I shall finish this page first," Teal'c said, face impassive, "and then I shall join you." 

She smiled and left with the Colonel. 

Quietly, Teal'c folded his magazine and looked around the commissary conspiratorially. Then, when he was sure no one was watching, he allowed himself to grin broadly. 

His plan had, once again, been successful. 

With immense satisfaction, he looked at the two finished cups of Jell-O. It had been a very good idea to warn Jonas Quinn in advance about O'Neill and MajorCarter's Jell-O competition. Very good indeed. As it had been a very good idea to warn Daniel Jackson nearly six years before, Doctor Fraiser some months after that and then, finally, her daughter. 

For, while Teal'c believed competition to be healthy in every day lives, he did not think competing over the flavor of a gelatinous dessert was productive. 

And, besides, orange was his favorite flavor too. 


End file.
